Entrepreneur Barbie Misses Mark In So Many Ways

Just in case anyone thought a ten day vacation was going to mellow me...are the women in this video actually serious?

“…exactly what we need to inspire a generation of young women to start opening their own businesses…” (Barbie?)

“…a role model and icon in the form of an entrepreneur is so exciting and the best form of inspiration…” (Really? Barbie is the best we can do?)

“…that looks like me, I can be that too…” (Who really looks like Barbie?)

“…dream big, you can be anything you want to be…don’t be afraid to take risks…don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t do something…” (Newsflash...no matter how hard I would ever dream or workout, I am not going to look like Barbie.)

And they are using #unapologetic. Really?

Additional commentary

Mostly, becoming a female entrepreneur is about having the confidence to take risks. And handing young girls misproportioned dolls who give them a skewed view of what's beautiful probably isn't going to help there.  Carrie Kerpen of Inc. 

“Playing with Barbie has an effect on girls’ ideas about their place in the world,” says Aurora Sherman, an associate professor in the School of Psychological Science at OSU. “It creates a limit on the sense of what’s possible for their future.” Sherman’s study of a sample of girls ages 4 to 7 found that girls who played with Barbie thought they could do fewer jobs than boys could do. But girls who played with Mrs. Potato Head reported nearly the same number of possible careers for themselves and for boys. There was no difference in results between girls who played with a Barbie wearing a dress and the career-focused, doctor version of the doll.

More from I-Chun Chen at bizjournals.com

Pink. Again.

So Wednesday the local fire department visited Audrey's kindergarten class. They got to sit in the truck and learned all about fire safety. And she came home with a pink hat. I asked, "Did the boys get pink hats too?" Very adamantly she replied, "No. Red is for boys. Pink is for girls."

My stomach sank. Seriously? Are separate hats necessary? What is the rationale? Do real women firefighters wear pink hats? Will girls only where fire hats if they are pink? I know it may seem minor, but I think it just reinforces, at a young age, that girls are different, lesser, softer, not to be taken as seriously.

In college, I had a professor tell me, "This body of work could be shown in any gallery in town right now." Another professor told me it didn't really matter what kind of work I produced because, "you are probably just going to get married anyway." At the time, I remember being angry. But I didn't have the confidence to say, "Fuck off, prick." Instead, I internalized much of misogynistic rhetoric of the entire department. I'd been absorbing it from the culture since childhood. "Boys are doctors. Girls are nurses. Boys take. Girls give." I just kind of accepted what the professor said, without a fight. Feeling lesser, feeling powerless, was just part of my deal in the 90's.

Without any prompts whatsoever from me, when her dad got home and saw the hat, he asked, "Did you get to pick if you wanted a red or a pink hat?" Very adamantly she replied, "No. Red is for boys. Pink is for girls." 

I wasn't quite sure how to turn this into a teachable moment. A lecture from me wasn't going to go far. I think Lindsey said something like, "Too bad they didn't have an orange hat just for you--your favorite color." She said, "But I love pink." So there you have it. The pink hats pander to the audience.  

I know at this age, kids are really into rules. Especially around gender. But that is why I think it is even more critical to not play into the stereotypes. I want my daughter to be able to say to the person handing out the fire hats, "No. I'll take a red one, please." And if I had a son, I'd want him to be able to say, "No. I'll take a pink one, please."

When there are options, they should have a choice. Otherwise, they all get red, equal.

Stupid. Pink. Hats.

 

You Don't Own Me

"You Don't Own Me" PSA from You Don't Own Me on Vimeo.

Wrapping The Week

{Source}

The inequalities that minorities and women in this country continue to struggle against seem insurmountable. It is difficult to "keep the faith" so to speak. It has been a rough summer. I have to believe things are going to get better. But I know I have to work for it too. Trying to figure out how to make an impact. To keep my head from not popping off my neck, I've been reading more to help me unwind, get out of my normal spaces. 

Reading this. And just finished The Uncoupling and The Ten Year Nap. New thrift store nearby has decent selection for under a dollar each.  Next, on to some feminist classics that I've never tackled. And Their Eyes Were Watching God.

Women stay in jobs longer than they should. And of the office...we use enough post-it notes to...well...this.

Better than the typical bucket list.

Bogaletch Gebre is an incredible woman.

And for some levity...Don't Pierce The Brat.

xoa

You Are Beautiful

I've had mixed feelings on some of Dove's campaigns over the past few years. But this one nails it.
As a corporate communications manager, I have been amazed at how often my female colleagues will complain about photos taken at events or ask me to remove photos of them from intranet postings. Not for any reason other than, "I look horrible." We have just a scant number of intact photos of my grandmother. In most photos she not so delicately used her fingernail to punch a little hole where her face belonged. So sad. Embrace your face ladies.

Good and Happy Enough

 {Supernova}

Last weekend I went to a local gift shop and located directly adjacent was Weight Watchers. I hadn't been to a meeting since January and I hadn't been tracking since Thanksgiving. With the move, life has been too busy. And losing 50 pounds has me happy enough. I feel better, move better, sleep better. But I weighed in and then I stayed for the after-meeting, thinking I just should. And that is when things went way south. Behind me was a 17-20 year old perfectly normal sized girl, 100% beautiful. And 50 pounds heavier, she would be wonderful just the way she is. It was the end of her first week on the program and she was lamenting about how hard the week had been for her and about times during the week when she had been "bad".

I'm not afraid to confess, I started crying. Not sobbing, but tears swelled up for sure. This completely healthy normal young girl felt like she wasn't good enough the way she was. Inside I was screaming, "You better run now sister. Run away from all this shit and run towards something important. Don't waste your youth, your life, on body issue crap." I left feeling awful. Not because I'd gained 5 pounds since November. (Who gives a flip?) I felt awful because it all seems so hopeless for girls. From Rehtaeh Parsons and Steubenville, to leaning in and equal pay, it's hard not to worry about the outlook for my girl--the future of all our children, and this is in America where things are exponentially better than for other Women In The World, right? Such bigger issues we need to be working on than our spare tires and flabby thighs.

Later in the week, my friend Jess, posted this link on her Facebook, which I thought was fabulous, if not for the faint of heart. And this Lindy West post is brilliant.

Obviously I don't regret losing the weight I lost last year because I was not healthy and it was all tied to a bunch of other baggage I was carrying around. But I'm a god damned supernova either way. And I'm going to own that more. It is a struggle. I wish I could do more for more girls. I'm doing what I can for my own daughter, but I feel like I'm called to do more. I'm feel compelled to figure it out.

Ideas, anyone?

Will I Be Pretty?

Wow. Can't believe I've never seen this before. Pretty powerful.

Raising a Daughter: Part II

I am enjoying the attention around gender neutral toys, brought to the forefront this Christmas when a 13 year old New Jersey girl, McKenna Pope, tried to buy an Easy Bake Oven for her brother. When her only option was a flowery purple and pink model, she started a petition aimed at the maker, Hasbro. Now famous chefs, like Bobby Flay are weighing in on the debate. And earlier this year, I read with glee about Harrod's gender neutral toy department.

I follow this issue because we are trying to raise a strong and confident daughter. The challenges are many. We don't have any princess gear, books, or movies. We have a few fairy wings and wands gifted to us. But she gets princess crap in her preschool treat bags. She's exposed at friends. It is unavoidable. She's asked for a Snow White doll for Christmas. 

For the most part, I think we are providing a good balance. She's an adventurous, inquisitive kid. She picks up worms and bugs. She loves maps and books about anatomy. She doesn't demand to wear only pink or dresses. In fact, she hates ruffles. She says when I wear lipstick I'm a "pretty mommy". But lately, I sort of correct her with responses like, "Mommy is pretty all of the time--when I get up in the morning or when I'm tired or even after a bad day." Not because I'm particularly vain. Oh brother, I'm not. But I want her to believe that being pretty is more about confidence and feeling secure and doing good - not looking good. And I want to believe it too.

She turns five next week. I am trying to not hover as much. I'm trying to provide her more autonomy. I want to honor who she is. Who she is becoming. I said it earlier this week and meant it wholeheartedly. I can't get enough of her awesome. She teaches me more than I will ever teach her.

I love Jada Pinkett Smith's recent response to critics who questioned why she would "LET" her daughter, Willow, cut her hair.

"Willow cut her hair because her beauty, her value, her worth is not measured by the length of her hair. It's also a statement that claims that even little girls have the RIGHT to own themselves and should not be a slave to even their mother's deepest insecurities, hopes and desires. Even little girls should not be a slave to the preconceived ideas of what a culture believes a little girl should be." 

Wow. That second sentence. Pretty powerful.

So, I'll think about Snow White some more and consider why it bothers me so. And probably get it for her. And we'll talk about it. And it will end up in a pile of other dolls she rarely plays with. Merry Christmas. Happy Birthday. My darling daughter.

Girls & Media